On the 15th of August my dad passed away and it was the most heartbreaking thing that could have happened in my life. It was something that I was not ready for. I didn't know how to deal with it because I never had someone that close to me die. It was really hard but what was harder was knowing that God didn't save him, physically.
The night when it all happened I prayed for him. I prayed for his soul to be saved. I prayed that God will save his soul from the pits of hell. I read Psalms upon Psalms and all of them talked about God saving our soul from hell.
Psalm 30:3 "You, Lord, brought me up from the realm of the dead; you spared me from going down to the pit."
Psalm 103:4 " Who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion."
All I hoped for was that in that short amount of time God spoke to him and he gave his life. God always gives us chances and I wanted to believe that God gave him a chance. It comforted me knowing that he did and my dad gave his life.
A couple days after we went to see his body and something amazing happened there. After seeing his body I came back out and sat in the waiting room and I immediately felt an arm embracing me from behind. It felt so real the only thing that I could of thought that it was, was God. That same night I was going to sleep and tears began to fall from my eyes and there it was again an arm going under neath me to embrace me. When I felt it I knew this time it was God because I remembered in his word he said "Blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted." (Matthew 5:4).
God was with me then and He is still with me now. Sometimes I think to myself that I am now fatherless. But God in his word said to me "A father to the fatherless..." (Psalm 68:5)
God was with me then and He is still with me now. Sometimes I think to myself that I am now fatherless. But God in his word said to me "A father to the fatherless..." (Psalm 68:5)
After everything passed one thing I would always ask God is if my dad was with Him. If he was saved and that God answered my prayer and saved his soul. A few nights after I received dreams and I want to believe that it was a sign from God.
I dreamt that something evil was entering my house and I didn't know what I had to do. All I knew was that I needed it to show itself fourth and plead the blood of Jesus over my life. But just before I could do that someone appeared. It was my dad. He was dressed in white and there was a glow around him. And he said to the evil thing "This is my family leave them alone I am watching over them." I am not to sure what happened after that because I woke up but I felt more at peace knowing that he is watching over us from about.
Another time I dreamt that he was still alive. He came into my room wearing a white t-shirt and a blue jeans and he said I am alive. Now in my dream I knew that he was not alive but seeing him there and saying that he is alive. I started to feel dizzy in my dream and I work up.
These are the things that makes my soul feel at peace knowing that my dad is with the Lord. I loved him very much. But God had a reason why everything happened. God probably knew if he allowed him to stay alive he would not have accepted him as he did there and then, even in his sick state. God has a plan and all I wanted to know was that my dad's soul is alive.
I dreamt that something evil was entering my house and I didn't know what I had to do. All I knew was that I needed it to show itself fourth and plead the blood of Jesus over my life. But just before I could do that someone appeared. It was my dad. He was dressed in white and there was a glow around him. And he said to the evil thing "This is my family leave them alone I am watching over them." I am not to sure what happened after that because I woke up but I felt more at peace knowing that he is watching over us from about.
Another time I dreamt that he was still alive. He came into my room wearing a white t-shirt and a blue jeans and he said I am alive. Now in my dream I knew that he was not alive but seeing him there and saying that he is alive. I started to feel dizzy in my dream and I work up.
These are the things that makes my soul feel at peace knowing that my dad is with the Lord. I loved him very much. But God had a reason why everything happened. God probably knew if he allowed him to stay alive he would not have accepted him as he did there and then, even in his sick state. God has a plan and all I wanted to know was that my dad's soul is alive.
When death comes into your life it traumatizes you and you don't know how to feel. You feel sick, sad, depressed, angry and so much more. Sometimes you think that God is unfair and that he should have saved the person and that he doesn't love you. But if you are a Christian like I am everything God does is to benefit us. God knew my hearts desire was to see him saved and guess what maybe this was the only way to give me it. God is good all the TIME. EVEN IN THE BAD TIMES HE IS STILL GOOD. Something worst could have happen to my dad later on God could have prevented that I don't know. But what I DO know is that I serve an AWESOME GOD.
Everyday I don't know how I move on but it's only by God's grace and strength that I do.
Lean on God.
Don't give up on Him.
Don't give up on Him.
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